Are you alone or isolated or do you know someone who is?  The list of attributes for healthy aging does not include “alone’ or “isolated”.  This is the first of a three part series reflecting on aging as a collaborative where I look first at Belonging.

Belongingness is essential for human well-being and paves a path with many sought after results such as heart health, happiness and longevity.   Examples include intimacy, friendship, receiving and giving affection and feeling part of a group.  In the 1940s Maslow included belongingness features in his theory involving the hierarchy of human needs.  More recently, studies on the impact of belonging on aging have confirmed the positive role it plays in aging well.

What are the principal features of belongingness to be mindful of in order to help yourself or someone you care for?

  • Belonging is a perception held by each individual versus a contrived or objective idea of belonging imposed by others.
  • The likelihood of experiencing belongingness is greater if we make concerted even if difficult efforts to engage and connect socially.
  • Focusing on others instead of ourselves can increase feelings of belonging. This is because finding purpose through helping others is a sure path to social connectivity thus fostering a strong sense of being part of something larger than one’s self.
  • Belongingness is assured when placed at the top of our priority list, right there with eating and sleeping.

Belonging is an aging collaborative.  We are living together here on this planet right now and we are aging collaboratively whether we recognize the great potential of it or not.  If you and yours are aging well with an abundance of belonging, please keep up it going and then spread it around every chance you get.  If you know someone with dwindling well-being you can likely make a difference through bringing a belongingness focus directly to them or to their formal or informal care providers by addressing the four principal features listed above. Social connectivity does not occur when isolated and alone.

Speaking openly about belonging is a great way to draw awareness to our collaborative aging.  Share your needs for belonging with others, allow others to do things for you as you do things for others. Unite with others to engage with and advocate for engagement in belonging across the life span – in the community, at home, and in care facilities.